Betrayal comes in many forms & in many relationships. Most people think of romantic relationships when the word Betrayal comes up.
Julius Caesar used it in regard to his friends and closest confidants. That is what I’m addressing today.
I had a friend who was after me for almost 2 years to come live with her & her son. It was only when I had reached the end of my patience with living in Charleston that I called & asked if the invitation was still valid. You see, I had alot of reservations in going there. One, I didn’t have transportation & being the control freak she is, I knew I would be at her mercy. She doesn’t like to take people anywhere. Past experience with living together had shown me just how freaking controlling she is and I simply despise that trait in people. Control your your own damn self & quit trying to control other people is my philosophy! And Two, she is a pathological liar. Really, this chick lies about the stupidest stuff as though we are all so dumb that we’ll believe her. (Really, you’re not having sex with Mike? Hmmm, I heard you doing it. You should know to keep your windows closed. And what about Larry? And Ronnie and God knows who else you tell J you didn’t have sex with?).
Long story short, I went to live with her. When I arrived I found that her son behaved like a wild fucking animal…jumping all over the furniture as though it was a playground. Slamming himself into the mattress (WTF is THAT all about?) and just generally behaving as a child who has not had any coherent supervision. He’s manipulative, too. Wow! Only 4 years old. I see PRISON in his future, just like his daddy:(
I was just getting over a very nasty staph infection and was quite ill when I arrived. She took very good care of me in that regard. One month after being there I knew I had made a horrendous mistake! She has had a problem with alcohol since the day I met her. It always amazed me that her own mother taught her to deal with her problems by drinking. Have a bad day? Have a drink. People at work stress you out? Have a drink. Traffic heavy on the way home? Kid being a brat? Have a freaking drink. How pathetic is that? If she get off the damned alcohol & get some professional help she could be a really amazing woman!
I’m venting and I know it. And you know what? It’s my damned blog & I can do what I want to in it? I just love the First Amendment🙂
For awhile everything seemed to be going really good. Until baby daddy interjected his punk-assed self into the picture. This girl is really pathetic when it comes to J. He cheats on her & has since the day I met them five years ago. He uses her and she knows it. I can speak of this shit because I was also addicted to a low-life piece of shit like him at one time. She stood by me, watched me deal with it, and yet she won’t walk away from it all. Apparently she has NO self esteem and I mean that. NONE. Nada. Zip. She allows this man to turn her inside out over & over & over. She knows how to stop it, but refuses to do so & then whines & cries when he treats her the way he has ALWAYS treated her. The definition of insanity? Doing the same thing over & over & expecting different results. She is, by definition, insane. And that insanity manifests itself in many ways. She changes her rules & her mind moment by moment. I’m not kidding! That is how insecure she is in her own decision making. I truly have never seen anything like it. I learned recently it is a trait of the schizophrenic.
All this time I was looking for work. After 6 months I had had only ONE call & ONE interview. That told me I was not in the right place! I wanted to go home. I did not belong in Charlotte. I applied seven damned days a week! I didn’t take off for holidays or weekends. Always, continually looking for work. I must be on ever job board in the world.
She & I started talking about living in the country. I would grow a HUGE garden, keep bees & harvest the honey, raise chickens & maybe even a goat (she had a thing about goats, obviously has not raised the stinking nasty beasts!) I was all for that. Meanwhile I still kept looking for work as I needed some sort of income. I had to ask her for everything and it severely wounded my pride. I could tell she relished the control she had. Sick bitch.
We used to tease each other that she was the husband & I was the wife. No lesbo action here, tho! I am STRICTLY DICKLY! It was just that she went to work outside the home & I took care of all of the house-wifely duties, including watching her son 2 days a week.
Speaking of the son. He behaved for me whenever mommy wasn’t around & acted like a spoiled little fucking brat when she was. I really came to detest the weekends. Power struggles, temper tantrums, drunken bouts of anger & blubbering STUPIDITY! Friday’s were my last day of peace. For the next 2 days I had to endure their idiocy. Oh how I adored Monday’s:)
On the days I watched little boy, it was pleasant. He rarely fought me to take a nap. I had to spank him only twice in the entire time I watched him. He knew I meant business because I backed up what I said. I didn’t say over & over that I was going to do thus & so. When I told him I would turn off the tv or spank his bottom, or take away his toys, I did just that. Not so with mommy. She threatened & threatened & threatened before she’d lose her drunken temper & smack the fuck out of him. Angry Parenting? Oh hell yes!!! I stayed out of it, knowing from experience that to speak my piece would mean I would be homeless.
That is exactly what happened.
I am certain her friends & family & co-workers have been given a different story about the events that led her to kick me out with no job, no money & no place to go.
It started, I believe, when her cat accidentally got out. I didn’t mean for it to happen. I truly didn’t! I love Pierre. He is one of the most beautiful cats I have ever seen. And he was sweet until he wanted to fight. He was mean as hell when that occurred. He was gone for 9 days. Having had cats for most of my 54 years on earth, I wasn’t the least bit worried. I knew he would make his way back eventually. They always do, unless they are really stupid. Pierre doesn’t strike me as a stupid cat. This girl flipped out over the cat being gone. I mean really lost her friggin mind over worrying about a fucking animal. For crying out loud. If he is so stupid that he can’t take care of himself, then he deserves to die. Survival of the fittest. That is how it works in the animal world. I learned a long time ago through all of the moving I did as a child, let it go. It’s just a pet. I know, some of you pet freaks will take issue with this. I really don’t care. An animal is NOT more important than a human to human relationship. For her it was the other way around.
Then came the coups de gras, so-to-speak. baby daddy proved to be the same sorry ass he always was. In her drunkeness she wanted to keep whining & whining about it. At first I said, “I don’t want to talk about this while you are drinking.” Yet, as drunkards always do, she kept on & on about how she felt so betrayed, how he lied to her (NO FUCKING KIDDING IDIOT! How is today any different from yesterday?). When I pointed out to her that he had been doing it for 7 years & when the fuck was she gonna wake up, she stood up & started yelling at me. Really? You’re gonna tower over me & scream cuz your dumbass keeps allowing this bitch-assed baby-daddy to fuck with your head? How is that MY fault?
When I said “I didn’t want to talk about this when you are drinking”, she became even more belligerent. I asked her if she hadn’t noticed that whenever she was drinking (EVERY FREAKING NIGHT!) that I often left the house or holded up in my corner of the room. And she started screaming at me to “LEAVE…GET THE FUCK OUT”, she kept screaming at me. I told her that she freaked her son out when she behaves the way she does. Then she threatened to hit me. HIT ME. Not this chick you are not! I learned from the last abusive relationship I was in. I will NEVER allow anyone to hit me, Not Ever. So I left. When I returned to the house several hours later I saw that she, her son & the freaking cat were gone. She had left a note saying that someone would come by in the morning to take me to the bus station.
My thought on that? Try to make it happen bitch. I’m not leaving my things cuz you’re a drunken asshole. BTW, Mandy, what happened to I’ll support you while we get our little farm going? I guess you prefer the booze to friendship & HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR SON. Remember? I grew up with an alcoholic parent. I know exactly what he is going through.
We didn’t talk for a couple of days. As far as I was concerned, our friendship ENDED when she threatened to hit me. The sad thing is, she doesn’t even remember saying it. Well I do. I wasn’t drunk. I don’t drink cuz I prefer to be in control of MYSELF.
I tried to get a ride back to Charleston. No one could help me. No one could come & get me. My family & friends & I all started praying that she would have to bring me to Charleston since she was the one who wanted me out so damned bad.
A couple of weeks went by & she brought me home. Home to my beloved Lowcountry. It was rough at first. None of the promises made were kept. My son’s house was literally full to the rafters with people. Friends spouses didn’t want me there. Karma motherfucker is all I have to say to that!
A friend finally came through. He & his wife, who have so very very little themselves, have graciously opened their door to me. A wonderful “coincidence” is that we are all members of the same church. How about that for God looking after His own? Thank You Father:)
The lying drunken bitch who threw me out? She said she cried all the way to Charlotte. Boo fucking Hoo!!! Now you are all alone bitch. No friends as I was the only real friend you had.
Enjoy that vodka Amanda. Cuz it’s the ONLY thing you have.